Saturday, December 31, 2005

Clearing Obstacles + Faith in God

Today is the last day of the year. Yet I've received a letter from the Army stating AWOL - IPPT. I was shocked as I was unaware of this as I'm studying in poly for 3 years and would not be required to do IPPT. I've already sent an email in faith that I need not report on the 18th Jan 2006 as I've school on that Wednesday morning. Many have responded through MSN and I'm glad to have such friends like you all.

Thanks to Samantha for all the verses you've given me. Thanks to Sufern for the prayer support. Thanks Gabriel for being a faithful brother in times of need. Thanks Lynn for being a great mei. Thanks Shen Lynn for the chat. And most of all, thanks be to God who created me and send me dreams and visions. The Lord has kept me safe and through this, I shall have great faith that all things work for good to those who love Him.

As I look through 2005, my relationship with people may have been bad in terms of friendship, possible BGR, family, but I know that God has been there even though I cannot hear Him clearly. Looking at the blessings, I received a Takamine guitar, I went to Believer Music for Worship Dynamics 2 (Guitar), received LIEN Foundation Scholarship, RP Awards - Best Overall SIT Student (2nd), and the other countless blessings the Lord had given me. And I could ask for more. Bought my camera and iPod as my birthday and christmas present. Really useful to me at these times of need.

Though the bad stuff came around this period of time, my grandma's death, letter from Army, financial difficulty, broken friendships, but I believe that all these will be settled if I leave them to the Lord. Nothing is impossible with God!! Praise God for wonderful memories. I pray that the email I've sent will resolve all the problems. Lord, I pray I'll be a better steward in the coming year.

Many times, I feel like giving up. But many around me kept telling me that God is great and wonderful. I know this fact. They kept telling me not to give up but to trust in Him. Even if I've to report in that morning, I pray for courage and the ability to take my IPPT for the coming window. I pray that I need not report as I really want to concentrate on my stuides, etc.

Keep me in prayers through these times and I'll rise up and not just work blindly for the Lord but to know Him, seek Him with all my heart. Thanks be to God.

Be Blessed!!

Wednesday, December 28, 2005

Mess decreases, Faith increases!!

These two weeks were as though a hurricane swept away my life and household. First, my financial crisis came when my school fees cannot be paid by my Dad's CPF. Then followed by the death of my grandma which literally made me lost control of my temper at times and sort of a time of retreat and the lack of rest.

Felt relieved after my financial matters were settled, the funeral is over, the music retreat has ended [it was fun and awesome], the musical ended on a high note for me and meeting up with Peng Chye, made me think through the areas of my life. Whether it is in terms of serving in which ministry, or whether it is in my attitude towards anyone or everyone. Somehow, I felt that putting trust in God is tough but by learning to trust Him, our faith increases.

I had the opportunity to drive the car without my dad's supervision for 1 ride last night around 11 plus. Had 3 rides within 24 hours made me confident of driving whether the supervision of anyone. Sometimes, it's more stressful when you have passengers controlling your thoughts when driving. It is extremely dangerous!! Don't try this on the road. Anyway, I enjoyed riding it and I hope I can drive to school someday.

Finally, the mess period is almost over and all I have to do it to clear the mess and move on. It's gonna be tough but I believe I can do it through Christ who strengthens me and of course with my cell encouraging me to move on. Thanks for the support by attending the wake. I really appreciate those who came and those who send their regards via sms/msn. Thanks a lot!! May God bless you this new year.

Be Blessed!!

Monday, December 26, 2005

Music Ministry Retreat [Dec 2005]

It's Music Ministry Retreat again!! Youth Worship Ministry had our own retreat at Guan Wen's place today! Thanks Guan Wen for the hospitality. Met up with Tab and Juz before we proceeded to Guan Wen's place. Juz forgot to bring Jenn's present so he went to get another copy.

We ate at MOS burger before proceeding to Guan Wen's place. When we reached there, some of them were there to decorate and prepare the retreat proper. We took lots of pics and video and I'll make a copy to everyone if possible. Meanwhile, most things are classified and shall not be blogged but I realized that I've made the right choice in staying in Music Ministry. Somehow, my season is timely and I'll be planning 5 years ahead soon.

Here are the pics:

Joshua [Great Eyebrows] + Joy

Justin + Lisa

Gerald + Justin + Kenny

Joline + Kenny

Lisa + Kenny

Cheryl + Justin + Kenny

Cheryl in action!!

Tabitha + Cheryl + Justin + Marcus

Lynn mei + Kenny kor.

Kenny + Pastor Jennifer [With her christmas gift] + Justin

It brings me joy to see that we are one big family, with our dear "Mother Jenn" and "Father John" + all the siblings, starting with Li Fang as the eldest sister. LOL. Family tree. Funny right? Had a great dinner. The food was awesome!! Now having a sore throat. Better preserve it for my interview tomorrow.

More pics to come.

Be Blessed!!

Sunday, December 25, 2005

Christmas isn't Christmas!

Christmas day..... 9 years ago, I was born again on Christmas day at St Hilda's Church baptism pool. I'm 9 years old today, 14 years church goer, 24 years old physically. I was with Gabriel and Janice, accompanied by Julian, Kristie, Joline and John at the musical and I was touched by the musical itself.

My grandma passed away yesterday, on christmas eve, and I don't even know her name till recently. I don't even know what she likes and whether she is really my grandma. I was lost in family love and I almost lost hope in that. The musical turned by perspective on this. I decided to really be there for my family even though I turned away from them. I was supposed to be at the wake but I told myself not to be involved or affected. But deep down within, God is shaping me and moulding me.

Through the series of events, I met up with Shen Lynn, Jun Lynn, Julian and Gabriel at Gab's place yesterday afternoon. Stringed Julian's guitar and had great time fellowship with them. After that, I met up with Lynn mei to pass her christmas gift. I'm glad she liked it. Mei, stay strong. I hope that call in the morning was good and continue to stay positive. Passed Joline her gift too and hope she likes her belated bday + christmas present. Nothing much but hope you like the gift. Anyway, thanks to Pastor Jenn for the gift, I really like it alot and appreciate the words on the card. It really encouraged me. Lastly, thanks Cheryl for the card. Appreciate your kindness and presence and a friend and ministry worker.

After the musical, went to Gab's place for refreshment. Then Janice, Gab and I went to Orchard to celebrate Christmas countdown. Oh man, Janice and I were traumatized by the crowd and the possibilities of getting injuried. I can tell you that I was scared that my bag gave way and everything might come off. The celebrations were a bit off hand and I believe there can be fights if not handled properly.

Helped Janice with her christmas gifts near her area and had great fellowship. Then sent her to her friend's place before Gab and I went to Bedok Interchange. Was talking to Lynn mei for almost 40 mins and then return to Gab's conversation with me. Ate breakfast at ard 5 plus just now and came back around 7am. WoW!! It was an awesome Men's talk session now and then.

Christmas isn't Christmas this year. I'm going through the 'in' and 'out' of life and hopefully each time I encounter with problems, I can seek the Lord directly rather than pouring out to my peers only. This Christmas is special and I'll treasure it. Looking forward to tomorrow's Music Ministry Retreat. More updates to come, later in the day.

Stay tuned for more updates and happenings in this season.

Be Blessed!!

Saturday, December 24, 2005

Fellowship + Musical!!

In the morning, had RP Open House photo shoot for the SAs involved. Then, I went for a lunch appointment with Peng Chye. It was awesome. Seems that I'm learning new things each day. Through that, I'm learning how to measure using God's ruler and my own ruler.

Went out to meet Shuming as she's leaving on Monday. Anyway, she's doing great. Elinna and Yixuan were there too. Thereafter, I met up with Peter and had dinner and some sharing. More to come, more to come. Met Gabriel's friends at Queenstown MRT station. They are Thomas, Siying and Lishi [hopefully correct spelling]. We had fun even though we watched the musical at room 308. Thanks Eugenia for the christmas gift. Thanks Peter for the card and Esther (Peter's sister) for the cookie. Anyway, we went to PS after the musical. Oh yeah, saw charlene, hannah at room 308 too. Hannah, nice to know that you brought your friend.

Went to PS, saw Mr Sabai [Juz]. LOL. He was at BK and guess what?? I couldn't find him again and he directed me again! Blur me!! Shen Lynn was at BK too. What a surprise. Great to see all of you today. It made my day great and awesome!! We had Long John Silvers and after that, went home. While waiting for the bus, Gab and I chatted a lot and I hope we will be praying for each other.

Meeting up more people tomorrow. Gab will be bringing Janice and I'll be there to support him again. Great to see more new faces. I hope I could ask. But too late. hai..... Keep up in faith and run the race. To Juz & Aure: We will have our mini retreat soon!! Miss you all. Love you lots!!

Be Blessed!!

Friday, December 23, 2005

Caroling + Interview!!

WoW!! The caroling session was awesome!! I'm glad all things work for the good of those who love Him!! My interview session is also confirmed and I'll be on my best for the interview! Hope I can get this job!

Gab was the caroling conductor! Great job for first timer. Julian was supposed to share but since all are believers, we cut that away and had fun! Hope this is not the last caroling. Jun Lynn, Shen Lynn [Jun Lynn's cousin], Peter and Pastor Bee came to join the fun too!! I'm glad to have this session closed but it's not ended. My mum wanted a caroling session too. Don't know if we would still have one but next year, sure will have a few. Better be prepared. No pictures for today coz not too entice anyone of the big big house we visited. Shall have cell there next time. Kristie's place is nice and it's near my place!! To think I travelled from my place to Toa Payoh then to Yio Chu Kang, followed by her place. I could have easily taken bus 854!!

Nice meeting Shen Lynn and hope we didn't bore you out. God is really awesome. Even though I had so many problems right now, Gab offered help and even my interview date is set. I hope I can get the job and start on my new year with confidence. Lord, let Your agenda become my agenda. Let Your will become mine. Let Your heartbeat be mine too. I've been feeling down but I felt that God is always comforting me. The rain today reminded me of His sadness and tears. It just couldn't stop even if I've ask Him to.

Anyway, I had a fun time and I believe Kristie is happy too!! Poly Cell girls, too bad, you've missed it. But don't worry, still got next year. Peng Chye, see you later in the day!!

Gonna rest soon coz I need to be the photographer for tomorrow's shoot. RP Open House 2006 shoot. Gab, rest well. See you tomorrow for musical. Julian, see ya for cycling, etc. Thanks all for the edifying night.

Be Blessed!!

Thursday, December 22, 2005

Reflections + Repentance + Reconciliation

I realized that what went through my mind these few days were utter nonsense. Though humanly speaking, it sounded convincing. Thoughts ran through my mind like a rushing wind. My heart was like a pounding board. My vision was screening through an endless dream.

The thoughts that came into my mind caused me to question these.....

I feel emptiness. I don't know what's going on, my life, etc.
I don't feel like going for cell anymore.
I don't see the need to go for cell.
I don't see God working in my life and I'm off.....
What is a cell group really?
I'm not gonna plan anymore stuff. Just not gonna do anything.
Planned caroling, people don't attend.
Why agree to it when you can't attend?
How to trust God? I simply don't know how to anymore.


Those were my thoughts and I was crushed. A reply came and stated.....
Why has your world and faith in God crumbled because the human system has failed you?
People failed you, not God
If things don't go according to planned, it shouldn't equate to God failing you.
And for whatever reasons that may be, God is using everything to mould and shape you.
Sometimes, we may not like it.....

At that instance, I told God..... I'm gonna bargain with You and if You are not working in my life anymore and walk with me, I'll leave. I believe God is love. I believe You are there. But I just cannot feel it anymore. I know it's not about feelings. But I really wanna hear His voice and obey Him. Lord, if You don't come along with me, I'll not move. I'll leave.

That was before caroling.....
Entry dated: 4.30pm, 22nd Dec 2005.

After the caroling, I felt very different. All those burdens were lifted up and nothing could stop me from sharing with others and nothing can stop me from worshipping. Though I know my life is on the rocky moments now, all I can do is to seek Him. I'll be able to hear His voice soon. Lord, give me Your will for me. I want to know my Will in You and continue to serve in the areas You've planted me into.

** I striked off the negative thoughts and I'm sure God is gonna do something in my life. Whether it's my root problem in relationships or in other areas, I believe He heals me from my past and hears my prayers. **

Lord, purify my heart. Santify my soul and make me whole. I want to be whole and not soulish. Forgive me of my deceitful life and make me complete. I ask that You will fill my Spirit-Man right now. Lord, take away every single thing that is not of You from my physical and spiritual being. Father, I acknowledge You as my Heavenly Father, Saviour and Counsellor. By Your strips, I am healed!! I pray therefore that You who have created me in Your image, mould me and shape me to be the person You truly want me to be. Use me Lord and I repent and reconcile with You, Lord.
In Jesus, most wonderful name,
Amen!!

More to come and more to share. Stay tuned!

Be Blessed!!

Wednesday, December 21, 2005

Birthday + Sharing Session with Yaling!

Hey Yaling!! It's been a long time since we last met. LOL. Thanks for taking time off to catching up! This little sis of mine and I had lunch and catching up to do. Counting back, we already knew each other for around 8 years!! Since she was 14, during our secondary school, Saint Hilda's Secondary School!!


Little Sis, Yaling!! Posted by Picasa


Yaling mei + Kenny kor. Posted by Picasa


Our 8 year friendship!! Posted by Picasa

I remembered the days when we were in school and all the fun in that Drop In Center [a place where we can relax in school]. Anyway, it's your birthday today and I wanna wish ya a Blessed 22nd Birthday!! One year older, must be wiser hor!! We had lunch at Funan before we took some pictures for momento. Anyway, we went to meet Julian at Trumpet Praise. Haha, did some shopping with Julian. Nice book I hope. Anyway, Julian + Gab, hope you like your christmas gifts!!


Welcome to the Black & White world! Posted by Picasa


Color Accent Effects!! [Only skin color] Posted by Picasa


That's my dear little sis, Yaling! Posted by Picasa

Thanks for the catching up session. Hope you enjoyed it. Take care hor!!

Be Blessed!!

Happy Birthday, Jenn & Evie!!

It's your birthday and it's time to relax!! Happy birthday, Jenn & Evie!! May the Lord bless you and keep you strong, keep you healthy and use you two in many ways! Continue to bless the many around you.


Evie & Jenn..... Happy Birthday to You!!

Be Blessed!!

Tuesday, December 20, 2005

Timor: Wave 2, finally back!!

Finally, all of you are back!! Gab + I rushed down after our dinner and happened to catch Tessa [Thank God!!] before I passed some christmas gifts to some of them. We were like hoping to see Tessa and guess we made it!! Praise God.

From far, I saw Alex and wanted to call out his name while he moved away and I didn't manage to find him. Peter was not around when I was there. Saw Aurelia mei and passed her christmas present. Then Ee-lyn was around, so I passed her christmas present too. Aure mei was happy to see her present coz she was thinking of getting a journal. Wishlist cleared!! I guess Justin and I had good shopping ideas! [Thx Juz!] Aure, hope you like your present. Ee-lyn, if you ever see this entry, hope you like your present too [Friend, you add colors to my life, therefore the present.....]

Shouldn't have ate that KFC but nvm lah..... at least met Tessa, Aure, Ee-lyn, Shermaine and Alex (from afar). Had a great time with Gab too. Hope he didn't find the bus trip too sianz..... Okay, mission accomplished. Left one task..... compile the carols and get it done now!!

Be right back for more excitement!!

Monday, December 19, 2005

Catching Up: Shuming + Gabriel!!

Christmas is around the corner and I finally meet up my dear little mei, Shuming!! It's great to see her since I only get to see her once a year. Really talked about lots of things! Had a fun time though. Thereafter, I had a session with Gabriel where we shared and had dinner together! The meatball invasion with prawn noodles [instant]!!

Anyway, I received an email today and I was quite upset and downcast. I realized that there is an outstanding bill for my tuition fees and I'm not prepared as I didn't really have much savings. Though I received my scholarship, I had spent it on various items, including christmas gifts. But with the encouragements flowing from my cell members, friends and many others, I really felt uplifted and treat it as something positive rather than negative. I'm sure God will see me through this and teach me valuable lessons.

Went to Coffee Club and had tea with Shuming. It was on her and I felt a bit bad. Anyway, the most important thing is that we talked about our issues and being open to share about our lives for the past year. I was glad that she understands and encouraged me and I'm really thankful that my mei really grown mature!! Keep it up, gal!!


My dearest mei, Shuming!! Posted by Picasa


Brother + Sister Forever!! Posted by Picasa


Elinna + Shuming. Posted by Picasa

Followed next, we went to see Elinna!! Actually, we met her before we went coffee club. Bought her snacks and we took some photos!! It's been quite some time since we catch up. After that, met Jessica and Georgina (Shuming's friends) and chatted a little. Went to Gabriel's place for dinner and we chatted with Eugenia [mortal] and had a great time. Left home at around 10pm and I felt that it was the start of a life changing experience. Suddenly, that burden was lifted up and I need not worry.


Elinna + Shuming + Kenny - Friends Forever.
Since 1999 Anglican Schools' Retreat. Posted by Picasa


Shuming + Kenny + Elinna!! One Big Family!! Posted by Picasa


Shuming's wonderful smile!! =) Posted by Picasa

Where was God in my life and in my day?? - I'm seeking for the answer NOW!!

Be Blessed!!

Sunday, December 18, 2005

[Christmas Shopping + Fellowship]

Met up with Justin today at Raffles City, Burger King, before setting off to our hotspots for Christmas shopping!! Before I met up with him, I happened to see Sarah, Samantha and May at Raffles City! It was really divine appointment! I was about to plan to meet Sarah and Samantha someday but in the end, I see all of them at one go. Really blessed!


Starting the day good!! Ready to set off!! Posted by Picasa


It's me again!! Trying out self portrait photography!! Posted by Picasa

Went to BK to look for Justin and didn't see him at all. Then he pat on my back and said, "Oei, you purposely never see me arh??". In actual fact, I really didn't spot him. Thought he would take a seat inside instead at the entrance of BK. Anyway, we went to Faith Hope Love christian bookstore then Trumpet Praise then back to Faith Hope Love before proceeding to Borders, Far East, Heeren and back to Borders!! LOL. Tell ya all, it's really a shopping spree!! I bought myself a sweater at FF Men. Guess what?? It's orange and grey! Justin bought a sweater too! Anyway, we continued shopping and saw other wind breakers, etc. I saw a Adidas Orange (totally orange) wind breaker. Wah!! I see the price, I can buy two more of the same type I bought. Justin also almost..... [note that it's almost] regret it as Adidas is having 30% discount!! LOL.


My new sweater!! Cool right?? Posted by Picasa

I saw Annabelle working at Starhub promoting that iMode technology which I'm testing right now. Wah, she got this kinda lobang, never jio me. Good sia. Anna, next time must tell me hor. I also saw Nilofer when I was having dinner with Justin at Pasta Mania (PS). Had a short little good chat. Hope she enjoyed her day too.

Justin and I had a great time again, updating each other ever since our cycling trip cum mini retreat. Aurelia mei, too bad, it's a guy's outing today and you are not in town. Will see you on Tuesday anyway. [By the time you read this, you probably tag/comment on my blog ba!]

For the Poly Cell Men, I've some stuff for you. Namely, Gab & Julian..... LOL. You will receive it on either Tues/Thurs. Do tell me whether you are going to airport to receive Tessa. This time, sorry to the Poly Cell Women, nothing to pass to you all. All in all, I had a fun time with Justin, talking through the serious and the humorous, even though we don't have energy to shop or joke. LOL. I guess we are getting older, Juz!!


Even wise men seek Jesus!! What more us?? Posted by Picasa

Thanks for the accompany and the ideas for Christmas presents. Christmas isn't about the gifts we give or receive. Christmas is about Jesus. He is the ultimate gift. My 'birthday' [the day I was re-born again on 25th December 1996] is coming on Christmas..... anyone wanna share that joy with me??

Be Blessed!!

Sharing is Caring!!

During the music ministry debriefing session, we had the usual debriefing and celebrated Jenn, Evie and Josh's birthday. It was supposed to be a surprise but too bad, it didn't worked out. Anyway, decided to get off church quick as we were hungry. I meant my cell members.


We're so happy!! Sing a happy song!! Posted by Picasa


Get ready!! Happy birthday to Evie, Jenn and Josh!! Posted by Picasa

We went to River Valley and had dinner. Thereafter, we went to Peng Chye's place for supper and a very very long sharing session. In fact, it was so long that we took cab home. It's really worth the buck!! Julian, Jac Seah, Peng Chye and I shared from the bottom of our hearts as we reflect on our lives, etc. It was enriching and encouraging. Seeing the cell growing and at the crossroads, taking each other into consideration and really caring for each other is all we need to do for each other.


Glad: Wen Jie, That's it!! Wen Jie: What's it?? Posted by Picasa

The fellowship was great and Julian really blessed me a lot through it all. Gabriel, Julian and I sort of got closer these few months and we sincerely need to make that conscicous effort to maintain this brotherhood!! Hope you are blessed when you see this. I'm greatly encouraged by my brothers in cell, at this moment, for such a time as this, to rise up and take up the challenge to serve and get out of our comfort zones.

In fact, it was this that struck me. I'm thinking of Sec 1 cell and Music Ministry again. It seem to be daunting and I wanna test it out. I'm giving myself 3 months to test it and see what the Lord will do in my life and really bring me through these. I hope it will be His will rather than my will or my thoughts/feelings. Lord, I come to you with a broken heart. Please mend it for me and restore my brokeness. Only You can restore and mend me.

In my heart, the surge indicates warning and I hope that this surge will decrease and Lord, You increase. The surge indicates His heartbeat. I'm sorry for the many things that I've failed to fulfill. Often through my own flesh, fulfilling my own will and selfish ambitions. I give my all to You and Lord, You take control.

I really had a blessed night. I hope this will continue. Right, Julian + Gab?? Thanks Peng Chye for being encouraging and supportive. Really appreciate it.

Thanks to Gathering of the Peas.

Be Blessed!!

Saturday, December 17, 2005

Haircut + Driving!!

Spent the entire day at Ricky's Hairworks. Did all my haircut there since 15 years old. I did another radical dye + highlight today!! It's Orange and Copper Brown. It's different from the one I did last year during June.



My mum dyed her hair too and my sister rebonded her hair. We started our session since 2:30pm, all the way to almost 11pm!! Wah, quite worth it. Oops, we spent alot though for this haircut session. But I felt so relaxed and really wanna get some customers before my holidays end.

My dad came to pick us up. And I drove!! I drove from Bishan MRT, all the way home. Through CTE, then followed by PIE. Exit via Eunos Link and drove up that slope, back to my area's little tricky carpark and parked the car. Still cannot park perfectly but improving I hope.

There's a breakthrough today. Drove through the Expressway!! Nice hairdo and relaxing moments. Hope that I can really teach well in my guitar later today. Gotta sleep. Nites!!

Be Blessed!!