As I was playing guitar for Thursday cell, I felt that I was just playing. Even though I could worshipped. Even though I could feel the spirit, something just wasn't right.
On Saturday, during the sec 1 cell, I was really disturbed. I felt that I've 'wasted' my time in there. I couldn't explain why was that so. As I came into His presence during the service, I broke down. If an imperfect man can even have the heartbeat of God, what am I? Who am I? As I kneeled and bow before the Lord, it was a commitment once again. I've sinned too much. Spare the details. I know my deeds, intentions and my wrongdoings.
Serving as it is at that moment just lost its essence. What picked me up was Him. Still it is God who strengthens me. No wonder it is stated in the scriptures. I can do all things through Christ who strengthens me. Through Who? Through Christ!!
As I set apart my 2 weeks of time to the Lord, I seek Him for forgiveness, for the foolish folly mistakes and to ask forgiveness from people whom I've hurt. It really takes lots of humility, effort and courage to do it. I hope that my cell members will be praying for me. I can't just attend cell without growing, without ownership and without passion.
Sorry if I've to take my break right now. I really need a refreshing + reflection time. May the Lord bless this time of consecration. Love my poly cell, sec 1 cell and Amphora (Band 2).
In His Love,
Kenny Ong
"Only by grace can we enter, only by grace can we stand."
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